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healing with ADHD
April 2012 Posts
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Healing is different than curing and it is important in treatment for ADHD that the gola is not to get over who you are, get rid of who you are but to make peace with who you are and become more of who you are.
Healing vs curing- pondering this contrast was especially helpful today. It's a concept I was able to acknowledge & integrate in relation to ADD some time ago. Today it speaks to me in another realm as it may to others on the site. As we know ADD is not our whole story-in our various roles, parent, child, worker, sibling, friend... we are generally juggling ADD &....helping a struggling child with school, caring for an elderly or sick family member, completing a vexing or time-sensitive work issue. In addition there may be a specific personal challenge-our own illness, grief, a disrupted relationship, something we can't just wish away.
Instead of losing heart & becoming stuck maybe we can hold ourselves gently, renew our commitment to joyful production & take that next baby step.
Thank you Sari.
I have become painfully aware of the negative voices in my head as I struggle to find acceptance. Reading about addictive behaviors, I have only lately realized that I have been seeing my negative self image in terms of how my early, undiagnosed problems with ADD may have affected me. But for so many of us it is more complicated and even people without ADD get into the same negative thinking. Reading other people's stories of addiction, I can relate to the early need to find some pain relief which can develop into real addictions. It really can be a hard, complicated journey for all of us struggling with any mental health problems. I feel I am at a real crossroads where, if I keep working at it, I have a chance to get the upper hand for once and maybe this time have the tools and enough self esteem to keep what I gain. This idea of healing and true acceptance rather than 'fixing' myself seems to be working so much better. Actually the 'fixing' approach wasn't working at all. Thanks again, Sari
Diver-"ain't it just the truth!" - sometimes it's just healthier & freeing to DECIDE not to chase approval/ acceptance from outside & as you say, the success rate isn't usually too great. Time is so much better spent on figuring out what works for us, the logistics of how we can be our BEST selves, in every sense of the word. If approval (meaning mutually respectful relationships) follows then so much the better.
Thank you for providing us with a place to be where others understand our ADD, even if they don't know us as individuals, where no one asks, "If you're so smart, how come you can't...," where others understand that we struggle at aspects of life others achieve effortlessly. It's not a disability people can see, but it's taken so much from who I could be. But the part of me that's been so lost and hurting has, from my first moments of understanding about my ADD, found profound refuge in your understanding and explanation and acceptance. Thank you.
I am just learning about me... I am hearing these voices of confusion so much now... the medication is helping with being less impulsive... I am trying to organize my mind...and it is hard...overwhelming...I am a very creative and special person ...and I have always tried to find the right place for myself...it is all making sense to me...
... I am sitting at my desk trying to get focused and get organized ... I am trying to do one thing at a time... it is hard ... I am having to define a different road map...
... I realize that I would always use food my coping method ... and it would calm me down ... and I would get my work done... I have just lost 30lbs... and I do not want to use the food as a support... and it doesn't seem to work...so while the food is not my addiction .. I am somewhat lost ... to try and focus...
...I have just got a new planner ...and I am trying to make my tasks smaller... and realistic ... i guess this is a rebirth ... to re-organize...
- I love who i am ... it is just i have to sort my brain's filing system