your emotional default settings

What is your emotional default position? You know how your computer has default positions that need to be reset in order to change them? If you don't reset them, they just automatically go back to their preset preferences. Well, that's what all of us do to some degree emotionally - especially when confronted with stressful situations.

We do this in relationships. When confronted with differences, confronted with feelings of inadequacy, confronted with old family messages or conflict, we have certain deeply ingrained and automatic ways of behaving or responding. We aren't usually even aware of these but whether we fight or flee, whether we connect or over-protect, set limits or put up walls, or just open the door and let who ever wants to run all over us, we all have preset positions we fall back into under stress.

Even before we take action to reset these, we have to first just begin to observe them to see what they are and when they go into operation.
So step back a little this coming month and notice how you characteristically and automatically act in the face of disappointment, or when a partner disagrees with you, or when you are afraid.

Write me and let me know what YOU discover about your own emotional presets or default settings - sari@sarisolden.com.